My Little Mathilda

I was reading Aly's post about baby names and she mentioned the name Mathilda. This was the name that I had originally wanted to name Hannah. It was my grandmother's middle name, Florence Mathilda. I envisioned calling her Mattie or Tillie. I love the name Mathilda. Sadly, I was the only one. I was out voted and Hannah was my second choice.

As luck would have it. Hannah has grown to have some resemblence to a young actress named, Mara Wilson . Mara has starred in the movie "Mathilda" about a child with special powers who outwits her mom and dad played by Danny DeVito and Rae Pearlman and the evil head mistress of her school. Hannah has come to love this movie and the little girl star who looks like her. Mara Wilson also starred in the new Miracle on 34 th Street, Thomas the Train, A Simple Wish and the Balloon Farm. All movies that we own. Watching Mara grow up on the screen is liking looking into the future of what Hannah will look like. It's rather weird.

What is weirder is that I'm not the only one who has noticed the resemblance. We were getting Hannah's hair cut a few months ago and the hairdresser commented that she looked so familiar. After moments of trying to place where she new our daughter from, she says, "Oh my God, she's Mathilda!" We assure her that she is not Mathilda and that the real Mathilda is now in her teens. Still the hairdresser cannot get over the resemblance.

Then the other night we were out to dinner with my in-laws and the waitress kept saying she looked like the little girl from the kid movies. I smiled and said "Mathilda?"

"No." the one with the train.

"Yep." I say. "We've noticed."

So what do you think? Is Mara Wilson, Hannah's doppleganger?

GIVING THANKS!

Well, the holiday season is upon us. My in-laws have arrived and soon Joel's family will be here to feast on Turkey and fixings and visit us for a few days. It is a wonderful time. Since I have been doing Weight Watchers (for next to forever), I have been trying to focus more time and energy on the meanings behind the holidays than the foods associated with them. Since Thanksgiving has always seemed to be entirely about the food and has such strong food connections, it is hard to change the focus. After all the Indians and Pilgrams ate together, isn't that the gist of the story. Of course, we all know the true reason for the holiday is to give thanks to God for the bountiful harvest. Sadly, my farming days have pretty much never happened beyond a couple failed vegetable gardens. I leave the harvest collection to Acme. Still my thoughts have been directed toward being thankful.

Quite honestly I have a lot to be thankful for and I think it is time that more time was spent on thankfulness and gratefulness, so I'm listing a few of the things I am thankful for...

1. For my family, who although scattered across the nation is kept close by e-mail and computer allowing me closer relationships with family that might have otherwise been lost to long distance.

2. For my children who are the light of my life and who bring me constant joy. Gary the quiet artistic one, always full of kindness. He is gentle, intelligent and has been the easiest child to raise into adulthood. I'm grateful that he never did drugs, got arrested, got anyone pregnant, got involved with unsavory kids, or got bad grades. He was a good kid and is a great adult. I am very proud of him. Hannah is my wild child. Full of life, giggles, and sparkling wit. She is a firecracker filled with emotion, reeling with laughter in one moment, screeching with anger the next and screaming with disappointment a few moments later. She is smart, feircly manipulative and the sweetest little darling all rolled into one. She is my baby girl and I love her dearly.

3. For my wonderful, supportive and loving husband. He is the kindest, sweetest man on earth. He takes care of me, loves me, and is so very patient with me. I am truly blessed to have found him and to have him fall in love with me.

4. For living in a time and place where I am free as a women to complain, rant and express opinions that are unpopular without fear of oppression, penalty or worse. That I am capable of supporting myself and have been afforded the opportunities in education, and employment that I have enjoyed.

5. That my father lived long enough to see me happily married and that he knew I was loved and cared for before his death.

6. That I have a circle of exceptionally caring and compassionate friends who although dispersed throughout the country are connected to me electronically and whom I can count on in good times and bad.

7. That I have always had enough.

8. That love is still the single greatest possession one can receive or give away and it is free of monetary cost but priceless to all who have it.

9. That the world is filled with kind and compassionate people who continue their good works in an effort to combat the cruelty and ignorance in the world.

10. That I have talents, passions, and skills and the time to enjoy, cultivate and participate in them.

11. That I can see a sunset, a bouquet of flowers, a beautiful blue butterfly fluttering through a field of lilac, and the fire of a oak tree in the midst of a grove of fir trees in October.

12. That I can smell the sweet clean fragrance of a tiny baby's head, the heady musty earthy odor of rotting leaves in the forest, and the gingery, spicey scent of baking ginger cookies.

13. That I can feel the softness of my cat's fur, the roughness of my husband's five o' clock shadow and the cushion of my soft pillow at night.

14. That I know the warmth of a home and it's safety and comforts. A blessing so many do not share.

15. That I have never known hunger, thirst, or severe poverty.

16. That I am here, alive and well and amazingly blessed


I hope that you all can find similar blessings in your lives. Have a wonderful Thanksgiving!!!

Hear Ye! Hear Ye! Hannah turns 5!!

It is so hard to describe the whirlwind my life has become in the five years since our darling girl came into our lives. It is difficult to describe the emotions that a parent encounters as they journey through life raising their children. With Hannah, the journey thus far has been truly a breathtaking experience. From the moment she arrived all scrunchy faced and purple we have been completely in awe of her. She melted her Daddy's heart the instant he held her. The amazed look in his eyes as he watched me pushing and grunting her into this world was worth far more than any expression to pass his upon his face since. In that moment, all of our lives changed. I had my baby girl to pamper with frills and lace. Gary had a baby sister to protect and adore and Joel had his first child, his little angel to spoil and dote upon.

Each day with Hannah is an adventure and it has all raced by so quickly it is hard to imagine how only yesterday she was struggling so desperately to roll over and then she was wobbling across the living room on precariously unpredictable legs, and today she was climbing a rock wall and running through a children's museum trilling with her friends and laughing with joy.

Each moment I spend with her I am enraptured. Her smile and laughter are intoxicating. The light in her eyes as she mischeviously teases or plays with us fills both of us with the greatest delight. She is strong, and independent. She will triumphantly march into a room to announce her latest success at the potty or to display a work of art. She is fearless which most times causes me great fear in this scary world we live.

Hannah is a brilliant light in the world. She is spirited and wild, expressive and unique. She has a sense of style that would rival some of Hollywood's divas. She loves to primp and polish and wear dresses and wild colors. She will create her own sense of style by mixing and matching her wardrobe to suit her moods and nuances. She loves to look pretty, cute and most importantly "sharp". This is her newest target in the fashion world, to look sharp.

Each day I grow more enamoured by our little diva. As she has celebrated this milestone of a birthday, she is so grown up now. She is eloquent when dialoguing with grown ups or chatting with her girlfriends. One moment she is innocently still a toddler and the next she is sarcastically demanding like a teen. You never know which Hannah you will get, but you can be sure that whichever one she is being, she is being true to herself and her own feelings.

I am so proud of this little firecracker of a girl as she turns five. She impresses me greatly with her affectionate nature and her infinite desire to learn and appreciate. Today, we had a birthday party for her and a few friends at the Discovery Museum www.discoverymuseum.com. This is a wonderful place for kids of all ages. Gary and Jessica even had a real blast. There are dozens of activities for kids to do. Hannah had her name written in Korean since they are having a Korean appreciation exihibit and put on a show of Korean music and dancing. The costumes were gorgeous with vibrant, hot pinks, yellows, reds, blues, greens, and oranges. We could see the dancers and hear the music during our time in our birthday room where we had pizza and birthday cake and juice. Hannah also got to pretend she was a news anchor for Action News and her picture was on the TV in the restaurant out front thanks to the help of a fellow toddler camera man. Then they got to play on a blue screen where with a push of a button, they were riding a pretend motorcycle down the highway, or were in the ocean waves, or under the sea swimming with the sharks or at the zoo in the lion's cage. They have Diner where the kids can pretend to cook, clean and wait tables it is very fifties style complete with an old VW beetle that kids can sit in and pretend to drive. They have a Courier Post news room where computer stations can help kids create a news paper complete with their own picture and byline in a matter of minutes. They have a huge Bob the Builder area with legos and hard hats, and a bulldozer bed. There were snakes and tarantulas, boats and fishing, sand pits with dinosaur bones, and a big bubble maker that will make a bubble around your kid. Hannah's favorite part was the elastic band spider web that kids can walk through.

It has been three fun filled days of birthday party. First Thursday was her real birthday so we had a little family party and she opened presents from Mommy, Daddy and Gary. Then Friday, Aunt Terrie was here so we sang Happy Birthday again and she helped make smiley face cookies and caramel apples for favors for her friends. We made gigantic chocolate chip cookies with M&M faces on them and Caramel apples drizzled with chocolate and dipped in peanut butter M&M's. She loves to help. Then today was her kid party. Mommy's tired, Hannah's playing and Daddy is giving away left over cake. What a great day we had.

Little Bo Peep

Well, I am pleased to announce after several weekends hard at work, I finished Hannah's costume. It came out pretty cute, if I do say so myself. She had the best time trick or treating this year. I got home in time to go out with her for a little bit. She walked up to the house and rang the bell by herself and said "Happy Halloween" and "thank you". She was quite the cutie. I just stood on the sidewalk and smiled and yelled "thank you" to the neighbors as we wandered from house to house. She was so excited by the whole process.

I made her a little lambie pocket book that she would put her candy in and then when it would get filled up we would dump the candy into the big bag that I was carrying. She truly made me laugh the way she would be so grown up running to and from the houses. Then when we would come to a house with a scary display involving a blow up grim reaper or big spider with glowing red eyes, she would suddenly turn into my baby girl and meekly ask me to hold her hand and go to the door with her. At one house, the teenagers who live there had turned the front yard into a huge grave yard complete with coffin and had the likes of Freddy Krueger, Dracula and Michael Myers hanging about waiting to scare the other kids. They left little ones be, but let me tell you, Hannah held fast to my hand while carefully eyeing up Mr. Myers who was casually posing for a photo op with some fellow trick or treaters. Glad he left me alone. That movie scared the heck out of me when I was in high school.

The best part came on the way back home. She squeezed my fingers with her tiny ones and told me that she loved me. I love that she is so sweetly affectionate with me. All those hugs and kisses and "I love you, momma" days are truly the best. As we neared the last few houses before our own, she visited a neighbor who admired her costume much to her delight. The woman, then asked her if she had been out looking for her sheep. Hannah held up her lambie pocket book which the lady admired saying that it looked as if she found her sheep after all. Hannah smiled and said, "I found her, but I have 20 more I'm still looking for." and she quickly returned to my side to find me laughing hysterically at her play acting. She is such a little ham bone. Sadly, Little Bo Peep had to potty so we had to hurry past the last few houses, but rest assured she is fully stocked with sugary confections enough to last through the winter.

I hope you all had as much fun this Halloween as we did.