The days are rushing by and Hannah is growing like a weed and I can't help thinking that I need to find a way to jump off this treadmill and find some way to grab hold of her before I miss it all completely. See, I sorta missed it all completely the first time around and it sucks. I had no choice being a single mom from the time Gary was 18 months old left me in a financial bind. So I worked and worked and worked trying to make ends meet and they barely ever did despite all I lost.
Gary is grateful for all I did give him and loves me dearly. Even at 23 he is still affectionate and caring toward his old mom. He has no resentment in his body toward anyone and he knows all that I did was for our survival. He's a bright kid. He gets it, but still I feel bad. I missed a lot, he missed a lot. He wanted to do cub scouts but couldnt' since they were after school and I worked. He played soccer and little league and played with friends and we had great times, but still I feel like he got short changed. I wasn't the happy go lucky cookie baking mom on the t.v. Well, my mom wasn't exactly Mrs. Brady when it comes down to it.
Still, Hannah is much more sensitive and she wants to do Brownies, she wants to dance, and she wants to learn to play the piano. Personally, I'm think she has ADD like me wanting to do more than is humanly possible all the time, but still how is it possible when we work. And not working isn't really an option not if we'd like to continue living in our nice middle class neighbor hood, with good schools and absorbenent property taxes. Good old NJ bleeding the working class dry.
So what to do. I inquired about Daisies (the tiny Brownies) and they meet after school of course. So this means, I either volunteer to lead a Saturday troop or evening troop, or say no. I am conflicted. Even so, I wanted to be a leader. I was one when Gary was a baby for a year. I love the Girl Scout organization, but its a big responsibility and I don't want to let Hannah down either. So, for now I'm taking it under consideration. I may see if there is a way to do online Girl Scouts. Now there is an idea, like homeschooling. You are the leader for your kid and you can do all the things to help them earn badges, sell cookies the whole thing but without all the scheduling difficulties. Hmmmm. Maybe I can sell the idea of Cyber Scouts to the GSA.
1 comment:
Of course you should. Is there anything you'd rather do with your free time? One can always make time for the things that they want to do. I'm in college, but I still manage to make time for video games. See?
Anyway, that's my 2 cents, and it's worth about that. However, you may be interested to know that I used your blog as part of an assignment for a class, and thought you might be interested to read what I had to say about your blog and its concept. I may be way off base, and I fully enourage you to say so if you feel it to be the case. It's all part of how the blogosphere works, right? If I have a blog, I should be involved in the community! So I hope you like what I had to say. I tried to be honest.
So here's the link to the article itself: click me!
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